Matchmaker Matchmaker

Maybe I've watched too many episodes of Millionaire Matchmaker, or maybe I'm just gullible, but I always assumed that there was a secret almost magical art to matchmaking. I guess not. All it takes is thinking you're good at it if you wanna work at this SoHo office. Maybe I'll stick to dating Uptown.

Meanwhile, in small type at the bottom of the post, it states that compensation is performance based. I'd love to know the criteria for this one. $100 bucks if your clients get to first base!

******************

Become a MATCHMAKER (No experience needed - Interviews this week)
 
Matchmaking service looking for excellent networker with outgoing personality to join our local group of matchmakers.

You must be passionate about helping others with their relationships. Therapy related background or matchmaking experience a huge plus.

There are several main responsibilities:

~ Matchmaking (we will provide access to our list of singles - you have to figure out who to set-up)
~ Talking to singles (in person and on skype/video)
~ Assisting with the dating process (Usually fun, sometimes not so fun... you'll have to handle it all!)

We are looking for candidates who are sincerely interested in helping others overcome their loneliness and start successful relationships. You must be an earnest friendly person who understands people and have just the right amount of audacity to try and set them up.

Please send your photo, resume and a short cover letter describing why you would like to be a matchmaker. If you have a knack for finding matches and have set-up friends or family don't forget to let us know about it!

Interviews are being scheduled for this upcoming week (SoHo). For now this is not for a full time position.

• Compensation: Performance Based 

(Via craigslist)

I've done multivariate testing of all kinds of roast chicken

Two things got me posting this morning. I learned the expression "multivariate testing" (see job posting after the jump) and I've been introduced to the world of algorithm-based recruiting.

Six months ago, after being laid off, I submitted my resume to a number of reasonably appropriate establishments in hopes of finding something new. Now it seems I'm a match! For something that looks really impressive. That I should probably respond to just to see how far I could get before they kicked me out the door.

Without going into my actual qualifications, let's just say that if a human had looked at my resume, they would have determined that I was not actually a match for this. I'd love to see some stats on how effective this kind of recruiting actually is. And I want to be negative, but odds are this would get forwarded to others, which could land them the perfect candidate. Which is basically what I'm doing now... Here's the email followed by the job posting. Have at it!

******************

Dear [name],

A job opening matching your profile for a position of Executive Director of Digital Marketing-DOW00000M has just been posted in our Careers Section.

If you would like to review the posting and apply online, click here or click Jobs to consult the list of other positions currently available.

If you do not wish to receive further job posting notifications, unsubscribe here. You can subscribe again later, while applying for a position or reviewing your profile.

We thank you for your interest in Dow Jones.

Best regards,

Dow Jones Recruiting Team

40% of 18-29 Year Olds are Jobless

But it looks like things are picking up. The key to success is being flexible, with a keen interest in health care or info tech. According to Indeed, overall there's been a 53% increase in job postings since last year.

Entry-level job market best in 3 years

Good news, college grads: the entry-level job market is the best it has been in three years — but you may have to settle for less money and a position outside your preferred career path, a new report from Challenger, Gray & Christmas shows.

“There’s lots of positive news out there, and we’re finally seeing some significant job creation,” says John Challenger, chief executive officer. But before you start daydreaming about the corner office, he adds one caveat: The job market isn’t what it used to be, and it may not provide the “ideal job situation” for everyone.

Read more at Reuters »

The Money Making Job of Your Dreams

I subscribe to all kinds of newsletters, most of which I toss, but this one from The Ladders caught my eye this morning. Even though this skews way out of the reach of most people, something about seeing all those salaries laid out makes me feel hopeful about the future. One question, what the hell is a Continuous Improvement Knowledge Manager?

Good Monday morning,

I thought today would be a good day to celebrate the successes of your fellow subscribers in landing jobs so far in April. There are too many to list in their entirety, so here is just a sample of jobs accepted so far this month:

Account Director	$120K
Account Executive	$110K
Account Manager	$115K
Benefits Director	$120K
Branch Manager	$140K
Business Architect	$102K
Business Development Manager	$130K
Business Development Manager	$164K
Chief Architect	$172K
Chief of Staff/Estates Manager	$210K
Client Executive	$135K
Consulting Manager	$130K
Continuous Improvement Knowledge Manager	$110K

If you play your cards right, it could turn into a reality tv series.

I've probably watched too many episodes of Hoarders, for a neat freak. And maybe that's why I'm fascinated by it. I wonder how often people in the cleaning profession run across unbearably messy homes. And how often they just say hell no, and go home.

Housecleaning

Guntersville, AL
I need someone to clean the mobile home of my mother who is unable to clean the house herself. The job would be for at least one hour, at least once per week. The hourly rate depends upon the skill and quality of the cleaning. The initial job is not for the light-hearted, as my mother is a hoarder, but it is not impossible and progresses quickly once started. After that, when regularly maintained, the job should be easier.

$25 - $50 per hour

(Via Care.com)

I wonder if they do pedicures?

GIRLS WITH PRETTY FEET NEEDED THIS THURSDAY! ($400 per night average) (Financial District)

Date: 2011-04-19, 11:46AM EDT
Reply to: job-jgjj2-2334396479@craigslist.org

World Famous Foot Fetish Company seeking female models to be FOOT WORSHIP PARTY GIRLS for the next event THIS THURSDAY April 21st!

It's simple. Really.

I don't really need to add any more words to this, as they've used more than they should be allowed, for a 3 month gig. According to Word it's 6,888 characters. To be fair, the site that stole this post from who knows where probably destroyed any formatting that would have made this legible, but still...

Mobile Graphic Designer

Job description:
Title: Mobile Graphic Designer Type: Contract to perm - 3 months Location: Atlanta, GA Summary and Responsibilities: Our client is looking for a UI Designer to design the user experience primarily for mobile and tablet platforms.